Expanding possibilities

Much has been written about the power of intention but the road to hell is paved with good intentions. Part of the difference that makes the difference, with and without intention, is the quality and effectiveness of our attention, because the effectiveness of our response to life, ourselves, others, possibilities, potential pointers or help etc, depends on what we notice or pay attention to.

The art of choosing what to focus on

When we keep checking if what is ‘wrong’ is still ‘wrong’, we make it harder for that to change. When, instead, we notice and focus on what is ‘right’ we put ourselves into a resourceful state from which it is easier to attract, create and allow more of what we want. We also tend to be better company, for ourselves and others.

To be even better company for ourselves and others, I recommend continually looking for interest, delight and inspiration. When we look with the expectation to find these things, we find them everywhere, even in things we consider mundane or believe we know well. Don’t forget to use all your senses, so that in addition to, for example, enjoying the sight of the curve in the road or taking interest in the changing patterns of light, we also find sounds, sensations, tastes and smells to enjoy and be interested by.

An additional focus we might want to choose, is our hearts.

Pro-actively changing the focus of our attention becomes easier the more we practise. It may feel strange at first, especially if we have been in “do-do land” - keeping ourselves too busy to notice much or focusing intensely on something. It may also be difficult if we have habits such as that of obsessing, but it is possible for everyone.

Withdraw attention

To help stop focusing on something, such as doubt, worry, pain or the past, visualise your thoughts as being like an old fashioned record player and then pull out the power plug, allowing the record to slowly come to a halt. At first, habits may resume, but, every time we pull the plug of our attention, it gets easier to stop and stay stopped.

Viva la difference

In general, men and women tend to pay attention to different things. Part of this is nature and part nurture or training. To be at choice, it helps to recognise our own habits of attention and to see what else is possible and, hence, available to us all.

Having had a sick husband and gone from no fixed place to live to owning 4 houses in 3 years, I am pretty handy around the house. I still need and want practical advice at times and have found that women rarely tell me anything I have not already thought of. Men, on the other hand, can often provide useful pointers to what then seems blindingly obvious.

Similarly, when I work with people from different cultures, their cultural conditioning can be very obvious to me. That means we can all learn from people from different cultures (including different generations) to notice what we miss, including our own cultural conditioning. Even better, we can learn to notice what they notice, not instead of what we currently notice, but in addition to.

Noticing more

Another way to notice more is realise the value of doing so and pay attention. To notice subtleties, our attention needs to be relaxed, so slowing down and being playful helps, as does knowing that we can’t get this wrong because what we notice is just that - what we notice. No one else has to notice it too for it to be valid.

Rather than ask whether we are right or wrong, a better question to ask is ‘how is this useful?’. The answer may not come in words or logic, so, having asked the question, we simply continue to notice all that we can notice.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, August 20th, 2008 at 11:05 am and is filed under co-creation. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.